"I mean, my first child was successful and became a Doctor, my 2nd kid had a great knack for sports, the 3rd was an artist and the 4th a musician, but this last kid of mine here- MAN DID HE SHIT THE BED. His mother and I should have plan B'd him. Anyway, as his father I'd like to wish him congratulations on his wedding day. Hopefully his bride here has good teeth and my future grandchildren aren't all turd burglars. Let's toast these losers before they pass out and the Howard Johnson hotel shuttle has to come and bring them back to their bridal suite. HERE HERE"

-Reviwers speech from the 2045 wedding of his 5th child-